Why is being authentic so hard?

     I haven't blogged in a while because it seemed like blogging was the last thing on my mind with everything else I had to do. I believe that we focus less on the things that we should be focusing on more a lot more often than we want to admit. I have been trying really hard to be authentic, but sometimes I find it hard because I allow my pride (fear, rejection, doubt, etc...) to keep me from revealing the "real me" to the world. I honestly believe the world is tired of seeing fake people, but social media (in my opinion) encourages its followers to post/reveal the good looking things in our life. I'm at a point in my life where I do not mind revealing the not so good stuff about my life if it will help encourage and lift others up. 

     I started this blog in February, but I never shared it because I was unsure if I would keep up with it. Well, after 2-3 days I decided to stop blogging because it was taking too much time and energy away from my family. The entire process of trying to figure out how to set my blog up, share my blog, get followers, etc...was overwhelming to say the least. The same thing happens when I use Facebook. Sometimes I find myself on a role posting encouraging messages and then it seems that the few minutes it takes me to log on and post a message and log back off is time I could be spending with my family. I know that God has called me to do the things I do, but I just can't seem to get the order that He has called me to do them in correct. I know for a fact that the reason I can't get the order correct is because sometimes I find myself putting Him last. Have you ever found yourself finding every excuse to use as to why you were unable to read your Bible, pray (I mean really pray not just babble a prayer), teach your kids bible scriptures, etc... 

     I am determined more than ever to start back putting more energy into cultivating my relationship with God than my relationship with my husband, children, family, and friends. I was on a role getting everything right and when I say my life was unbelievable...I honestly couldn't believe how awesome my life was myself (and still is). The thing that made my life so awesome was that God was actually first. I started my day with Him, I allowed Him into each and every part of my day, I never made a decision without consulting Him, I became intimate with Him, I ended my day with Him, I dreamed about Him...God really directed every aspect of my life. The last 3 weeks I feel like I just haven't been able to get it right, but it was because I refused to acknowledge that God was no longer first in my life. He was no longer my "boo thang" as much as I hated to admit it. Do you sometimes find yourself afraid of admitting the truth when God already knows the truth? I don't know why I was afraid to admit it, but once I did it seems like the dust that was covering my eyes was gone and I was able to get out of the rut I found myself in.

    Sometimes we find ourselves hiding from the truth, or hiding the truth from others when what we need to do is acknowledge the truth so that we can be set free to grow and become who we were destined to be. So many people hide behind social media and only post to the world the stuff that looks good. I refuse to be that kind of person. I refuse to blog or be on facebook posting stuff when my home is out of order, my marriage is hanging on by a string, my kids are out of order, I'm out of order (lol!), etc... I refuse to live a lie in the public eye and feel like it's ok. It's not ok because I’m missing out on my chance to help set someone else free. 

     So many Christians and non-believers are hurting because no one is willing to be authentic anymore. The last six months of my life has all but fallen apart. The thing that has kept me sane and kept my life in tact is my faith in God. I can't think of any other way I would've made it through what felt like the hell I was going through. I know that God has taken me through so much because my testimony will glorify him, but why did I press pause on my quest to be vulnerable for Him and allow others to come behind the scenes of my life? I can’t answer that question, but one thing I know for sure is that I’ve pressed play again and I’m ready to be who I know I was called to be. Being authentic, truthful, and vulnerable is who God has called me to be in this season. God may not have called you to share the things that He has called me to share, so don’t judge me because I’m being who I was called to be. I challenge you today to be who you were created to be. The way to do it is the same way you eat an elephant "by taking one bite at a time, and enjoying each bite you take along the way." 

Hello world, I am Tiffany Williams, and I'm a royal woman that’s destined for royalty. 

In His love and mine,

Tiffany